Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Willpower! Do you have what it takes?

As we put Christmas 2011 behind us and look forward to the beginning of 2012, many of us are thinking about what we want to accomplish, what we want to do differently and steps we will take to make a difference.  Many will engage in making New Years Resolutions and will start the year with a bang, convinced this is the year they will make a difference.  Unfortunately, many of these resolutions will fail from lack of one thing.....WILLPOWER!  Too many times, we just don't have the willpower to make a change.

I submit, many of the problems our country is experiencing is due to lack of willpower.  Businesses, politicians and citizens simply don't have willpower, to make the tough choices required to achieve better results. Politician's concerns for getting votes, makes it too difficult for them to make the tough choice of refusing to keep spending money. Business leaders are too focused on short-term stock prices to make the tough choices needed for long-term viability. Citizens are too worried about buying the next gadget, to make the tough choices to save their money, instead of spending.  The need to have the latest edition of a product; please some constituency, meet some shareholder's demand, cause many problems that could be avoided, if we simply had willpower.

How many gym memberships won't be used by the end of January?  How many credit cards will be cut up, only to have new ones replace them?  How many will start online education and then quit after one semester? How many will start the year regularly attending church only to quit once a winter storm arrives?  How many marriages will fail because involved parties give up? There are many other areas, but you get the point.  Our lives don't change, simply because we lack the commitment to follow through and the desire to make needed changes; quite simply we lack WILLPOWER.  Too many people's physical, financial, spiritual and relational well being will not be as good as it could, because they don't have the willpower to follow through and make a real difference.

What could we accomplish if we exercised our willpower?  What kind of improvement would we see in the lives of our friends, families, communities and our country if we stuck to it?  Think about areas in your life that you need to change, make those changes and then have the WILLPOWER to make it happen.  I bet your 2012 will be much better than your 2011!

Now, I'm going to have that piece of pie I've been trying to resist:)

Happy New Year!

Sunday, December 18, 2011

What does it really mean to be a Christian?

Ok.....so we hear so many people these days profess to be a Christian. Now, I'm not saying I have all the answers or I'm always successful but I have been thinking a lot about that word and what it means.

I honestly believe the word has become so common, we no longer really take the time to think about what we are saying, when we say, "I'm a Christian."  I won't take the time to go into a biblical discussion about exactly what the word means, but I hope I can at least make us think about it.

In its roots, the word Christian means "Christ-like." Now, I can only speak for myself, but that seems to me to be a very powerful meaning and unfortunately, I fall short more than I would want to admit!  My limited understanding of Christ, is that He wasn't interested in fitting into anyone's specific mold.  Religious leaders of his day were unapproachable, untouchable and were more interested in hype than substance.  If I read my Bible correctly, Jesus hung out the uneducated, ate with sinners and impacted those He met everyday.  In fact, the religious leaders of his day are the very ones who wanted to kill him! Now, I wonder why that was.......I'm guessing because he revealed their fraud and in doing so, provided an example for us to follow today.

I could go on, but my point is not to give a Biblical lecture, but rather make us think about how me may be identified in our daily responsibilities and how we might really become a Christian.  I'm confident we all recognize a real Christian when we see one.  To me, I am identified as a Christian, not but what I profess but how that profession is translated into action.  A Christian isn't someone that just shows up to church a couple of times a week, but rather, someone that actually lives what they learn at church!  It isn't saying one thing and doing another.  It isn't taking advantage of the goodness of others. It isn't using scripture to achieve my own agenda. It isn't just my words, but in fact, how I live those words out every day!  Some may have a different opinion as to what a Christian is but I think we all know when we see a real one!

Please understand, none of us are perfect, least of all, yours truly, but it is my hope that we all try to continually live better. We are in the perfect season of the year to reflect on being a Christian and I, for one, hope those I come in contact with, at least recognize my desire to be a real Christian!  Maybe, just maybe, if we really thought about what the word means before we use it, we might actually show the world what a real Christian looks like.

Have a Merry Christmas!

Sunday, December 11, 2011

What Do You Focus On?

I love watching people!  Seriously, you should try it some time and I promise you, it will be quiet entertaining.  Try this, just watch as people walk by, look at the expressions on their face and try to imagine what they are thinking....shoot, for that matter, make it up in your on head! Ok, maybe I have lost it but I've done this myself and find it quiet humorous!

I also love to find out what makes people tick, why do they act the way they do or what, exactly, are they wanting?  To really understand people, I have found I need to figure out what they are focusing on.  I'm not talking about what they are looking at literally, but what is it they are trying to accomplish.

Now, I know we are all busy and the world seems to be moving at lightening speed, but if we ever realized what  we are focusing on, it would probably reduce our stress level.  I suspect, too many times we are focused on things that really don't matter or since I'm grew up in south Louisiana, "it don't amount to a hill of beans." Personally, I can get so worked up about something, that in the big scheme of things don't matter and later realize, I was worried about something that I should have ignored.  My wife (Lord, bless that lady) has often brought this to my attention and I admit, I have a long way to go to fixing this issue....NO comment needed from said wife:)

All of this has made me start thinking about "what should I be focused on?"  Here is what I have determined:

1) My relationship with God- now I'm not trying to get all spiritual on you but if that relationship isn't right, you will never find fulfillment.

2) My relationship with my family- my wife and kids are the most important people in the world to me.  If you don't fall into that group, then you just have to understand. Here is the deal, when all the rest of the world forgets about me or moves on, those 3 folks will always have my back.  Outside of my immediate family, I care about my extended family.  I know we all have some "weirdos" in the bunch and you folks know who you are, so don't make me start calling names, but yes, I care about you too.

3) My relationship with my friends---I'm not talking about the "friends" that are friends when they need something. I'm talking about those, "died in the wool, I'll walk through hell, kind of friends.  Those folks that know you can be just plain ignorant and they don't care.  People that time and distance may separate you from but they are still your FRIEND!  Yes, I have a few of those and I appreciate all of them.

If you don't fall into one of those groups, don't get all "hot and bothered."  I'll still do my best to treat you right and be a good citizen, but just understand you don't make the Top 3 of my areas of focus. You may come in a close #4 or #5 and you will have to just settle for that... unless you somehow can crack of the other areas and the God slot ain't changing.

So why don't you just give it some thought...."what do you focus on" and is it really important.  I bet, it will change your perspective on a lot of things and probably make you a better person.

Now, go do some people watching:)

Thursday, December 1, 2011

What is Compassion???

You may think the answer to this question is very obvious, but I would like to explore it a little deeper. Every year, around this time of year, we hear a lot about showing compassion and there are many opportunities to give to others. While we all hope we are compassionate, I sometimes wonder if the actions we take are really that helpful and compassionate.

Over the last several days, I have had numerous opportunities to give to people and in some instances I engaged in those opportunities.  However, it has also made me think, if I am really doing what is best for the individual.  For instance, traveling like I do, I have had several instances of people approaching me at a gas station or fast food establishment asking for gas, money, food, etc.  I have been amazed that if I offer to purchase food or pay for gas directly, I have often been rejected.  This made me start thinking.....are the actions we take really compassionate or are we just "kicking the can?"

We have all heard the saying, "give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach him to fish and you feed him for a lifetime."  I think we need to spend more time, teaching people rather than giving to them!  Let me say, I understand in this tough economy, there are many people hurting and with significant needs and I have no problem helping these folks, because I have been there.  I just want to make sure I am helping them.  For instance, if I give someone money thinking they have a legitimate need only to find out they take some outlandish vacation, have I really helped them?  If I give money and they waste it on alcohol or drugs, have I helped them?  What if I give them food, without inquiring to the reason for their need or what they are doing to help themselves, am I really helping them?  I'm not saying just because I give, I have a right to control how they use it, but I do believe I have a responsibility to make sure I'm a good steward of what I have been given.

Our government has created a large group of society that takes no responsibility for their actions but quickly cashes the government check they receive every month.  They take, take, take from the government but do absolutely nothing to help themselves.  Yes, unemployment is high but that doesn't mean there are no jobs to be had!  Take a look around you and notice how many "help wanted" signs you see.  Now, maybe they don't pay what someone would want, but it sure beats NOTHING!  I was raised to work hard and not depend on someone else.  My dad took jobs nobody else wanted, so he could provide for our family, so excuse me if I have no patience for some "Occupy Wall Street" pansy who whines! Get off of your backside and do something! We have a problem when people make more money mooching off of the government and have no incentive to WORK!  Every 26 seconds, a child drops out of high school and most of them end up on the government payroll (there are some that rise up and make something of themselves).  If we just continue this trend, we will soon have a country of no innovation, no incentives, no desire and ultimately no responsibility! We must take action to keep kids in school, provide incentives for hard work and give a hand up not a hand out!

I have indeed been blessed and have much to be thankful for, but I have also worked hard to be successful.  The road hasn't always been easy and I've had to ask for help from time to time, but it wasn't because I wasn't trying to better myself.  I'm proud of how God has blessed me and what the hard work of my wife and I have allowed us to achieve.  I'm proud of my two kids, who have learned there is no such thing as a free lunch.  I will forever be thankful, but that doesn't mean I'm going to take it for granted.  No, I'm going to keep working, keep pushing and keep trying to achieve even more.  It's not greed, it is a strong desire to provide the best life I can for my family.  I know first hand life isn't easy and that's why I want to make sure that my compassion actually goes to those in need.

If you have a need, I will be compassionate but I will also hold you accountable.  Am I wrong????

Sunday, November 27, 2011

Is Thanksgiving Over?

I've always enjoyed the holidays and I love this time of year.  This year I have noted many people making daily post about what they are thankful for, which got me to thinking.....what if we expressed our thankfulness every day of the year, instead of just a couple of months?

Think about it. We live in the greatest country in all the world. Even the poorest among us have much more than the richest of other countries.  We are allowed to worship the way we choose and if someone chooses not to, that is their right.  We have social programs to assist the less fortunate and a government, though it may not be perfect, is the best in the world.  I'm sure you could add to the list of benefits each of us enjoy and for which we should be thankful.  I'm confident we would all agree, we are a very blessed people.

Too many times, we allow our circumstances to determine our attitude of gratitude.  If our smart phones don't act too smart, it ruins our day.  If our latte isn't quite right, it ruins our day. If we have to wait just a little too long to order, it ruins our day.  If we have to use the automated system when calling a service provider, it ruins our day.... ok, maybe that one is justified:)  But really, should these small inconveniences have such a big impact on our attitude?  I think we all know the answer to that question! You see, our circumstances should not determine our thankfulness!  We have too much to be thankful for, to get upset about such minor problems.  

So, what would happen if we changed our thinking and refused to allow "things" to impact our attitude? What if we took the time to thank those who provide us service?  A while back, I tried a little experiment and was pleased at the result.  I happened to be outside when our "garbage man" came by to empty our garbage.  I made a point of walking over and telling him "thank you for doing such a good job."  This man's face lit up with a big smile and you could tell how much he appreciated it.  Guess what, I felt pretty good also, knowing I had put a smile on that guy's face.  The impact of this small token of appreciation made me realize how easy it would be, to make our world a better place, if we all just took the time to show appreciation.  Now I admit, I often get too busy and too caught up in my own world to take the time to consistently show my appreciation, but that is no excuse.  Think about the change we can bring to the world of others, if we made a concerted effort to show our gratefulness. Guess what, it would make us feel better as well.

So what do you say? Let's all take the time every day to show our appreciation and make some one's day brighter.  Try it.  You will like the results. I guarantee it!    

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!


Sunday, October 16, 2011

What Is Your Strategy?

Now, I know most folks don't set around and meditate about their strategy.  Honestly, most folks probably don't ever think about strategy and may not even have one.  That is a problem!

The Good Book says, "....without a vision, the people perish."  Strategy is simply a vision about what you are wanting to accomplish and how you plan to do it.  Your strategy doesn't have to be perfect, because strategy is about thinking, doing, learning and adapting.  If you aren't learning in life, you aren't paying attention. There are going to be bumps in the road, you're going to make mistakes and if you take the time to think about your mistakes, learn from them and adapt along the way, I guarantee you will see your vision come to pass. Author Stephen Bungay says, "strategy is thoughtful, purposive action" and unfortunately, I believe our problems are caused by too many people being too lazy to actually take action.

You may be wondering, "why do I even need a strategy?"  Great question and the answer is very simple.  Most folks want to get a good job, paying them good money, earn enough to provide a good life for their family, find a great spouse, have a happy marriage and raise responsible children and see them have successful lives as well.  Guess what.....those things don't just happen!  You have to take action every day in order for these things to become a reality.  I'm strongly believe the reason for high divorce rates, broken families, unhappy children and many other problems in our world, are the result of too many not having a strategy, that will lead them to a better life. Too many, simply put their life on cruise control and figure what ever happens, happens.  Really???  Do you really want to leave such important things in your life to chance?  I don't think we do. We just simply don't take the time to really plan for our future success.

I don't claim to have all the answers and I've made my share of mistakes but, I have also learned from them.  I've made a decision to not sit passively by and hope things work out.  No, I try to take action several times a day to lead me to a better and more fulfilling tomorrow.  I'm not going to depend on school teachers, college professors and pop culture to teach my kids values.  I'm going to do it!  I'm not going to let someone else show my spouse and children what love really is....I"m going to do it!  I'm not going to depend on someone to give me money and support me....I'm going to work!  I'm not even going to depend on my church to show my family how to live a better life and plan for eternity....I'm going to do it!  You see, that is my responsibility as a spouse and father!  It is also my strategy to a happy life and it's working pretty good so far!  How about you join me and let's make this world a better place?

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

..."But Why?"

If you have kids or if you remember when you were a kid, I'm sure you can relate to a situation all parents encounter at some point and more often than we would like. I remember, as a kid, asking my parents the reason for something and them providing an answer, but then me saying....."but why?"  I'm confident everyone that is a parent has encountered this and oftentimes wish your little interrogator would just accept the answer you provided.  Our quest for knowledge and deeper understanding will not allow us to just accept how things are and we seek a greater understanding.  Many times, this leads us to also want to change the circumstances and not just accept "this is how things are done around here."

Some of the greatest changes in our world and the greatest inventions happened because someone refused the accepted response and asked, "but why?"  We recently mourned the passing of Steve Jobs, who we all know, refused to accepted how things were and challenged everyone around him to continually improve and adapt.  I'm confident, if you just take a moment, there are many situations you can relate to where improvements were made, simply because someone followed up with a "but why."  With that in mind, I have a few "but whys" I would like someone to consider......

"BUT WHY"

1) Should drug users be allowed to live in public housing paid for the taxpayers?
2) Do politicians work for special interest instead of our interest?
3) Should our country provide financial aid to countries who hate us?
4) Shouldn't healthcare providers be paid based on results instead of procedures?
5) Couldn't those on unemployment provide community service until they find a job?
6) Do illegal aliens receive benefits paid for by U.S. citizens?
7) Are politicians pensions better than military pensions?
8) Are athletes and celebrities role models for our kids instead of real heros?
9) Are people who cheat on their taxes allowed to serve in our government?
10) Do "We the People" not change our country?

I could go on but I think you get the picture.  I'm sure you could add many of your own questions to this list and I encourage you to do so.  Regarding #10, I think we all know the reason is too many times we are too preoccupied or just don't care unless and until it directly impacts us.  I think we can do better and I think all we need is a little more COMMON SENSE!

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Common Man Common Sense

Greetings folks!  You may ask yourself "why in the world would I read a blog about common sense?" Well, it's because it isn't so common!  Have you looked around your world lately?  Too many focus solely on themselves, not giving any consideration for their fellowman.  It wasn't too long ago a President advised, "ask not what your country can do for you but ask what can you do for your country." Trust me, our society has long since forgot that advise.

Common Sense tells a man to open a door for a lady, tells a lady you don't have to dress like a hooker to be attractive, tells guys it really isn't cool to wear your pants around your knees, teaches us all that what we say and the actions we take do matter, disciplining our children isn't child abuse, but rather a responsibility of all parents.  Common Sense doesn't allow me to have a 57-inch HD TV, while living on government welfare or to walk around looking for a handout, instead of looking for a job.  Common Sense doesn't want or expect our government to do for me, what I can do for myself.  Common Sense understands that we are a country founded on Christian principles and that freedom of religion does not mean freedom from religion. Common Sense believes the right you have to worship or not worship doesn't mean you can prohibit me from worship.  Common Sense understands we might not have to pray after a tragedy, if we took the time to pray before one. Common Sense means pay our teachers, firefighters, police officers and military a decent wage since they do make our world a better place.

So you see, Common Sense really isn't so common and I think it is time we put forth a little effort to bring it back.  We all gripe about our culture and what the world has come to, but I'm thinking if we spent that time using some common sense, we would be surprised at the difference it would make!

The Common Man